For a bad day. Especially good when you get dumped.
What's so funny?
Have you heard the way this guy talks?
On second thought, you might not be able to laugh, as you'll probably be gagging.
(I was pulling cheesy Edward quotes for this scrapbook I'm working on for my best friend and I couldn't find a description of Bella's about how Edward smells. Anyone know?)
and dangerous, as I don't know how to use a gun, and I really doubt I have hostages either. Just in case:
Time
I'd really like to paint my toenails and watch that movie I dvr'd 3 weeks ago.
A way to get through to them
I'll say it again: Edward isn't real!
My library card
It seems to still be missing...
The perfect joke
And guaranteed laughs. You can only use, "what's black and white and black and white and black and white?" so many times.
BTW: A penguin.
What's black and white and laughing?
The penguin who pushed him!
The power of time travel
What I wouldn't give to be Hiro Nakamura (before he lost his power). I want to meet Queen Elizabeth I and Leonardo Da Vinci and Charles Dickens and Jane Austen and Dumbledore and Merlin...
Hopefully by the time the zombies get here, some genius at Apple will have invented a zombie-proofing spray. If not, we'll have to take action.
Obviously, we'll fight back. Zombies are dead, and therefore don't move very fast, so running is always an option. They're decaying and worm-eaten and won't be able to withstand repetitve kicking. While machine guns might not kill something that's already dead, I think if we pull all their limbs apart we might be able to escape to the moon before they reassemble themselves.
Additionally the zombies will have particularly bad communication skills. Depending on which zombie movie you believe, they probably can't talk very well. A language of grunts and gestures can only get you so far.
Zombie or vampire in a dark alley at night? I'll take the zombie any day. (Yes, even over Edward Cullen.)
