Spit out your lies and chewing gum

Spit out your lies and chewing gum

I keep starting posts and not writing them and coming back to them and staring at the song lyrics I've put into the titles and not writing anything and now I'm back here again thinking that maybe I can't blog because as much as everything seems to suck right now and most of the time I know that it actually doesn't. I've made it a priority over the past year, as horrible as this sounds, to fill my life with things that make me happy and things that don't stress me out and to get rid of things that don't those fit qualifications. Today my sun-shaped 10-happy-things-a-day calendar had "new episodes of your favorite TV shows" on it and also "pretzel sticks" and I love both my favorite TV shows and pretzel sticks because they're unexpected.

I'm sitting here listening to "Be Here Now" by Ray LaMontagne and my dash is filled with pictures of Paris, which is my future home, at least I keep telling people it is in the hope that that will make it truer, and when I'm there I'll call Ray the Mountain. In two weeks I'll be out of my least favorite class and in half a year I'll be somewhere new where people maybe will consider that right and wrong aren't black and white.

This morning Gilly and I were driving to school and I said, "I hope they play P!nk this morning" and then the current song ended and my new favorite P!nk song came on, which I think is confirmation that I'm psychic and can occasionally control the radio, and that sometimes things happen just because they really really need to. I can't organize my thoughts right now and I seem to have ended my love affair with the comma but I guess it's good that I have thoughts to put down in the first place. I've been writing a lot lately, knock on wood and bite my tongue, and none of it makes any sense or means anything but it's fun and it helps me sleep better.