Through the woods we riiiiiiiiide

Through the woods we riiiiiiiiide

There is potentially some wrong with my brain, isn't that where they've traced depression to?  Something wrong with the chemical balance in my brain.  I don't know.  I don't know if I'm actually depressed.  I don't know anything right now, except that I'm sad and I cry too much and today I sat on the grass for 45 minutes and moved every few minutes as the sun moved.  I don't want to be in the shade anymore.  I don't want to be cold anymore.

Today I did something really risky and dumb and very un-Natasha-like, and I probably shouldn't have done it but it's too late now and for some reason I'm not worried about it, though I probably should be.  I should be working on one of my three papers right now.  I should be reading for Friday.  There are lots of things I should be doing.  That's what I hate most about this place.  There's always something not that I could be doing, but that I should be doing.  God, summer is so nice, why can't it be summer all the time?  Or always Friday.