Such a revelrie

Such a revelrie

I'm feeling a feeling that I haven't felt in a while, not really since I started college at all actually, which is left-out-ness, which is the sense that I missed something and that none of the jokes are going to make sense any more.  Which obviously isn't true, and is clearly something that I make up in my head, and I'm trying to cry I want to cry but it's not happening.

I have this unbelievable fear that next semester when I'm not taking art history I'm going to miss it so much that I'm going to hurt, and I'm going to start hating all of my other classes because they're not art history like maybe I so desperately want them to be.  Why can't I make up my mind?  I'm running out of time.

I don't know how to feel right know.  Are you supposed to know how to feel?