Your walk-by lies

Your walk-by lies

I think people tend to misunderstand me because I can't verbalize my thoughts the way I want to, and so that's led me to just not speak.  So I've become this person who is just... silent.  With everything and everyone.  The only people that I'm truly comfortable with, truly candid with, are the ones that I've lived with for an extended period of time.  (Plus X and Y, but those are exceptions and weird and unexpected and examples of how people continually surprise me.)

And I guess when I say that I want to change, that I want to break out of this box that I've built myself into, I don't mean that I want to rebel against my parents or my schoolwork or my lifestyle.  Because I like who I am.  I like that I have my morals and that I know what I believe, and I don't think any of that will change any time soon.

The other day in class Mrs. K was talking about being overemotional, and her theory is that overemotional-ness is kind of the opposite of autism, as in instead of being unable to connect with people, with your environment, you connect too much, connect with everything and everyone.  And on one hand I feel like that's me, totally and completely, but then again I feel like it's backfired, because I've boxed myself into this corner where I feel like there is absolutely no one I can really talk to.

So really, I guess, I don't know what I want.