I'm up in the woods, I'm down on my mind

I'm up in the woods, I'm down on my mind

I'm currently listening to Bon Iver because I feel like winter and like sadness and like the ending of "Remember Me" just broke my heart.  Even when I know something's coming it hits me just as hard as if it were unexpected.  And I'm feeling really alone right now, not exactly lonely but alone, I guess because it's late(ish) and my eyes are dry from crying and I reached 20,000 words last night, and I think I wrote an ending that I don't want to reach yet.
  
Tomorrow is Sunday, which means that the day after tomorrow is Monday, and Monday is always horrible - actually all the days where I have to go to school are horrible, but I guess things are never going to get better if I don't try to change them.  I've been saying that for months, I suppose, but I guess I have to change who I am, not necessarily who I want to be, but who I am at the current moment, at all the current moments, and that, I guess, is a process that I'm hesitant to start because it looks like it's going to be never-ending.  E said that I've chosen to be the way that I am, and by that I mean shy and withdrawn and cowering in the corner, and I guess I have, and I guess it's because I've decided that's the safest way to be.