Pretend there's something more left in your town

Pretend there's something more left in your town

This is a Looking for Alaska sort of night.  A crying over The Notebook sort of night.  A night in which I wish I am Emma Watson, get nostalgic over "The OC", and wonder why Owl City lyrics are suddenly so relevant to my life.  I've reached this point where no one can tell me what I should do, because no one knows.  But the problem is that I don't know either.  I'm sitting here listening to the playlist I'm working on for my French penpal and I can hear the heater fan humming and I'm thinking that I should repaint my nails tonight because I hate when they get all chipped like this.

And I'm wondering why I'm not more upset.  An hour ago I was screaming at my mom for giving me advice that I didn't want to hear and now... Now, I'm just not sure.  I suddenly feel like everything's going to be okay despite the fact that there's no way everything could be okay.  It's like the ending to "Pearl Harbor", a movie that I'm sure I think about much more than anyone else who watched it in AP World last year.  Ben Affleck's character and Josh Hartnett's character are best friends.  But then one of them dies in the war (I don't remember specifically which one but I don't think it matters that much) and the one that didn't die ends up with the dead one's girl friend.  Then they have a kid and name it after the dead one.  They were happy, Kate Beckinsale and the not-dead character, as happy as they could be, but they were still living with the thought of the dead character.  So it worked out, but really, it didn't.

But chances are that I put way more emotion into that movie than it actually had.  It was a war movie, after all, about the bombings and crashes and explosions.  But I'm me, oversensitive, overemotional.  Feeling things that aren't really there.

Or rather, feeling things too heavily.  That's what got me into this mess in the first place.

As the Kangster has been known to say time and time again, "BLEH."